"I know EXACTLY what's going to happen once we get back to the Mountainhome, Cap'n. We'll go to the barracks and have a sparring match. You'll knock me on my butt, like you always do,
and then you'll realize you don't have to retire! You're only, what, a hundred thirty? Hundred forty?"
"I'm a hundred and sixty-five,
lass! I don't have that many years left on me, and I'm gettin' slower with each one that passes!"
"I used to be a soldier, you know! I fought in the War next to Ushat Kokebdurad the Unmoving, and Muthkat Bestershire, the Marked! Even Sarvesh Zustashibruk of Silverwalls stood by my side! I was in the Great Dwarven Legion, standin' in the shield walls with my back straight and my head held high!"
"Now look at me.
All soft. And fat.
Sword rustin' to bits in the scabbard, can't even stand up on me own no more.
"Alright, that settles it. I'm retirin' the second we get back.
Might make myself into a fisherdwarf I think.
Spend the rest of me days fishin' and relaxin'."
"Cap'n, this whole thing sounds ridiculous. Who would want to spend all their time scooping slimy fish out of the water when you could be doing something IMPORTANT, like defending the trade depo from kobolds, or invisible kobolds, or invisible were-kobolds, or...or any other kind of invisible-slash-were-kobold that could be lurking around???"
"For the love of - I said no, lass! I ain't gonna spend my twilight years pokin' shadows for kobolds!"